Rabu, April 27, 2011

Being a Woman


Halo halo hiyaaaa.. *jayus*
I'm still in spring break! Gaston county has longer spring break than other county, but still, despite the fact I prefer go to school than stay at home, as I always say: time is flying here.

Tulisan gue kali ini memang random sekali, maaf saudara-saudara :p Well gara-garanya si Arya ngelindur ngomongin soal nikah muda terus *haha stress* juga gara-gara teman-teman saya yang sering sekali memberondongi saya dengan komentar "kenapa-nggak-cari-bule" -___-

Oke, gue jawab. Gue nggak minat sama yang namanya LDR antarkontinen.. Gue optimis kok someday I'll come back here either for vacation, study or stay.. well we never know! Tapi tanpa kepastian ya gue ogah karena ending dari relationshipnya sangat mudah ditebak :p Dan juga kalo gue pikir punya pasangan yang lahir dan tumbuh besar di budaya yang sama lebih nyaman aja :p Ngga tau sih ya masalah jodoh mah.. Hehe. *nyokap bokap gue pasti geleng-geleng baca tulian gue, haha --'*

If you know me, I'm sure you know how much I love singing though I'm not a professional singer. Dan gue punya mimpi *yang mungkin kedengarannya agak nggak waras* buat punya empat anak: sopran-also-tenor-bass :D Gue inget banget diketawain sama classmates dan guru gue di kelas choir gara-gara gue curhat soal itu :p

Oke, sorry. :p Kembali ke topik. Become a woman for me is a gift, a challange, a dilemma. Let's start from a simple thing kaya prom (again). Seliberalnya Amerika kata orang, semajunya wanita sejak jaman Kartini, tetep aja gue nggak bisa yang namanya ngajak cowok duluan. Hiiyy~ Kadang gue pengen bikin riset deh pandangan cowok soal batasan agresifitas cewek --'

Jadi cewek ituu.. anugerah. Kalo inget sabda Nabi soal 'surga di telapak kaki ibu' dan list orang yang harus kita hormati (ibu-ibu-ibu-ayah tau kan?) rasanya bangga dan bersyukur jadi perempuan. Jadi inget kata mama, perempuan itu setinggi apapun degree pendidikannya or posisi di tempat kerja tetep harus bisa ngurus rumah dan anak: multitasking-red. :) Udah gitu mau pake rok monggo, pake celana juga ngga apa-apa *ngga nyambung*

Jadi cewek itu.. tantangan dan dilemma. Surprisingly, banyak lo temen gue yang passionnya untuk sosial atau karir tinggi yang bilang "Kok gue jadi mikir nggak mau nikah ya?" atau setatement yang sejenis. I know I haven't even been twenty and so do my friends, I know our minds are always changing by the time.. Tapi emang realita kalau jadi perempuan itu membingungkan. Mau berkarir tapi juga mikirin berkeluarga. Kaya gue aja nih mau jadi dokter tapi lamanya itu.. bikin gue merenung. Gue nggak mau salah pilih buat masa depan..

Haduh, lomba nyanyi gue hari Sabtu dan gue belum latihan, zzz -___-
~sorry for this random post!

AB

Jumat, April 15, 2011

Reflection of Rain


4.14 am, I can't sleep again.
It's raining outside, seems like reflecting my feeling right now.

UN just finished..
And the reality that I won't see my friends again in the same school really brings me down :'(
I still remember how 12 IPA 1 came to my house with farewell banner and pictures, also the "curhat"session full of tears.. Thank you very much! You guys are just so silly! :'p We had so much fun even I have only a year with y'all. Oh ya, I love Kansas and Kandang Mbe too :p

Rinduuu sekali saya mendengar adzan. Kangen masakan mama. I'm glad Ramadhan is coming soon I'm home! Sahur, buka, teraweh, silaturahmi, mudik Lebaran! I can't wait to come home , kembali ke pelukan keluarga tercinta :)

Spring break is here. I hate this. I wanna go to school, it is the best part of my exchange year! Udah jadi tulang belulang kalo gue ngga sekolah di sini..


~yang ngepost lagi galau, makanya ini posting asli ngga penting haha

Senin, April 11, 2011

April-May-June.. Counting Down.

Holaaa! How are y'all doing? :))
80 days left, weeeeww.. Soon I'll be busy of bimbel, exam, college thingy, everything'll back to my normal life! Yeah yeah it means another senior year in high school :( But it's worthed thou :p

I'm excited of going back home, but half of my heart has been here already.. Just like the other exchange students, going to college abroad is one thing that is in my mind right now. My plan is getting my bachelor degree in Univeristy of Indonesia (amiiinn!) and then find scholarship for graduate program. :) My choices are still medicine and psychology, but I still figure out and make sure myself this is the right choices. Sometimes majoring vocal performance makes me doubt, but.. anyway. I better enjoy my last weeks in United rather than getting frustated about college! Not now :p But I've been practicing problems for exam too here! I'm lucky my teachers are just as excited as me in discussing all that problems.

Oh God, I do miss bubur ayam and nasi Padang! -___- I'm tired of sandwiches, hahah --" #random

Seems like I'm growing and growing up everyday. Last month I felt so melancholic, afraid of going back home.. But now I think I'm ready. Thou adjusting with the weather which is getting warmer (despite thunderstorm that happened twice this week) is kinda hard for me (i hate hot even before I came here!), it is what it is! Spring break is coming next week, but I'm not that excited because i don't have any plan -___- I wish I could go with Arya-Eki-Zia traveling in northeast - i need to wait til my hostfam came home from vacation to ask for permission. World seems so unfair.. when I have spring break all my friends are struggling for passing national exam :( Good luck dearest friends! I do wish we could graduate together.. Throw away all our uniforms together. I wanna sing for our graduation too (well I'm part of y'all! I'm always be) if I had gone home in on May.. I just can say good luck and I'll mention y'all in my prayers :) For 12 IPA 1, thank you for amazing farewell for me! :') (the thing is i don't think I wanna y'all to come to the airport coz i don't wanna hear any comments like: "fat" and "dark" -___-)

I got a lesson this week. If you let a thing go with a sincere, God will give you better things even more than what you expect! I've decided to withdraw from Miss. Asia Carolina pageant, and focus to my district competition. And guess what: I am asked to be a guest performer in the talent night! :) I never even expected that. I am also asked to sing, dance, and do some presentations in some schools. And.. Mrs. Robinson asked me if I wanted to do the senior solo in spring concert next month. Sure I'll do! I wanna song 'Time to Say Goodbye' for all of them who have made this year memorable for me.. They just makes my day! :))) Domna, my local coordinator also gives me and Shasha permission to go to my city dream where my college dream is tehre: BOSTON. I'm gonna be there after graduation! Also go to NYC, shopping time! We're comiiiinnnnggg :D

Last thing.. I just realize I've been enjoying being single for almost two years! :p I'm normal, I'm just an ordinary girl who sometimes feel like I wanna date with somebody - especially here in United States *kidding :p But it'd just make it hard for me to come here and go home.. I understand now why parents always say "later" about dating after my lil brother is starting become a teenage and fall in love! I just don't like it --" Well I'll turn 18 soon I get home and sure I'll get permission to have boyfriend from my parents - without backstreet anymore :p But why should I have one just because I wanna have a relationship status in my facebook profile? :p I will just save the best for last.. The right guy in the right time will make it right. ;) I don't run away from my past with somebody else.. no more, but I do something else instead. :) *what are you talking about, Azka? I know right :p

Gotta go shower, I'll post again tomorrow!
- Buenas noches! Thanks for visiting my blog and read my random post anyway ;)

Love, AB.